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ARTICLE 17
KINDERGARTEN COURSE TO BECOME A RECORDING ARTIST


"Talent" is not required!

WHAT WON'T WORK! - The surest way to squander your life and spend it in abject poverty is to be idiotic enough to suppose that Record Companies "need talent" or finance pipe dreams. Being in the business of being a Recording Artist is being in the Business of BEING a Recording Artist! And if you can show any Record Company the garage General Motors gave to the mechanic - or the restaurant General Mills gave to the Chef - then that Record Company will give you a FREE Business of being a Recording Artist!
The damned lies of ASCAP, BMI and SESAC notwithstanding!

The next biggest blunder is thinking YOU can 'distribute' your own records! You can, with a few million bucks in the bank, but not Blivethead International Records from over next to the garbage dump. However, getting a release on a distributed label takes about ten minutes of common sense and ten thousand years of no paranoia! Details of exactly how to do that are linked below. You'll need to re-educate yourself out of the deliberately perpetuated Beer Joint Baritone delusions and into the real world of phonograph records. And EDUCATION in those realities is the key.
The damned lies of ASCAP, BMI and SESAC notwithstanding!

On a different level of the subject of Education: Nothing beats a good education, and that includes music, but having a Degree in Music doesn't guarantee a Recording Contract. It might guarantee a license to TEACH, but if you're thinking of a Music Career as a performer, as opposed to being a Conductor, then a Degree in Music is all but worthless. And you're going to have to make a financial investment to be in the Business of being a Recording Artist.
The damned lies of ASCAP, BMI and SESAC notwithstanding!

Publishing is FREE to songwriters! That's it! The entire freebie in existence. But being a songwriter does not entitle you to a FREE recording contract - and neither does anything else! If you contact the damned liars at ASCAP, BMI or SESAC, and ask about any monetary investment in music: they'll tell you that "spending any money is paying for publishing" - knowing damned well that being your own Executive Producer is not! NEVER pay a publisher! Not for 'lead sheets', not for 'better demos', not for anything else a Publisher needs or has to do to exploit a song!

And NEVER believe a god-damned thing the lying thieves at ASCAP, BMI or SESAC say about anything or anyone concerned with Recorded Music! They'll tell any lie, endorse any Beer Joint Baritone delusion, defame any honest offer, or commit virtually any other damnable act necessary to keep YOU or anyone else not in their respective 'Pay' or 'Pittance' Cliques out of this best-of-all businesses.

Even so, when any Record Company fronts any money - whether for recording (including demos), promotion, concert tours, whatever - each and every penny is taken out of the Artist's earnings with interest before the Artist is paid one red cent! And the entire debt must be repaid in full before the contract will expire. It's called "charge back" and there are no front money contracts without it!
The damned lies of ASCAP, BMI and SESAC notwithstanding!

You can avoid charge-back - double your mechanical royalties - retain 100% control of your Masters - retain 100% control of what to record and how to record it - and retain 100% control over your career - by being your own Executive Producer!
The damned lies of ASCAP, BMI and SESAC notwithstanding!

And, being your own Executive Producer avoids being paid LESS for your own music and being CHARGED EXTRA to use somebody else's! That's one of the big traps in record contracts - If you use your own compositions, the record company pays you less than if someone else were to record your songs - if you use somebody else's compositions, the record company deducts the full mechanical royalty and all the administrative costs to deduct and disburse it PLUS THE INTEREST from your already reduced rate royalties! The only record companies that don't do that are those affiliated with VANDOR MUSIC GROUP!
The damned lies of ASCAP, BMI and SESAC notwithstanding!

But before you blast off on some half-cocked emotional tangent - and blow your budget right down the commode - read the article hyperlinked below and learn how to produce a commercially acceptable record. It's raw, it's rough, and it's intended to be. Recorded Music is a raw and rough Industry, and neither the weak-kneed, namby-pambys, mealy-mouths, industry ignorants or paranoids can survive it, let alone profit in it.
The damned lies of ASCAP, BMI and SESAC notwithstanding!

You need to make a record! You don't need to go to Nashville, New York or Hollywood to do it. Anyone with more brains than a brick - and their stupidity on hold - can make a commercially acceptable recording. Read the article PRODUCTION, DO IT RIGHT THE FIRST TIME! and you'll learn all you really need to know except the electronics. Before you record one solitary note: You'll need an Executive Producers Record Release Agreement! Before you spend any money other than a practice-session demo (which are virtually worthless!) for the Record Company to hear you, get that ExP agreement.
The damned lies of ASCAP, BMI and SESAC notwithstanding!

You can make a perfectly acceptable demo in your living room, at any practice or live-play session - you do not need a studio demo - unless there's simply no other way to get one! And WHY is a 'demo' virtually worthless? Nothing is more ignorant than going to a studio to make a demo to send to a record company to send you to a studio to make a record! WHY didn't you make a RECORD while you were there?! And NEVER confuse a tape-recorder operator with being a Record Producer!
The damned lies of ASCAP, BMI and SESAC notwithstanding!

You'll need good industry advice to make a commercially acceptable record, and it's free from the Record Company once you're ready to do business. You'll know what to do, what to avoid, and the what-won't-works, by just reading through the links of this site. Make sure you read it all, study it all, and if you have legitimate questions, the Licenser or Label Representative will be glad to answer them.
The damned lies of ASCAP, BMI and SESAC notwithstanding!

DO NOT
MANUFACTURE YOUR FINISHED RECORDING
UNDER ANY CONDITIONS!


That blows the anti-counterfeiting all to hell and you've destroyed any protection against the counterfeiters cleaning your clock should you come up with a good selling record! The Record Company will do all the anti-counterfeiting and manufacturing - and everything else that needs doing.
The damned lies of ASCAP, BMI and SESAC notwithstanding!

Being your own Executive Producer (ExP) will double your royalties because you'll be paid for being both ExP and Artist, and give you 100% control over your music and your career. If you're an ExP and produce someone else as an Artist, you can deduct all your costs from just the Artist's earnings, including interest, before you have to pay them one red cent! It's done all the time, and especially by labels who 'front' any money. However, even if an Artist earns enough to pay all the bills in full - they still won't own the masters! Whoever paid for them originally still owns them.
The damned lies of ASCAP, BMI and SESAC notwithstanding!

It takes time to do all the preparation, manufacture and delivery, so don't call the Record Company every hour on the hour with your paranoia intact! The time they squander humoring your stupidity is time they can't spend handling your product - so be patient - your Executive will keep you up to date. And know from minute one: only ONE record out of EIGHT ever sells any copies at all! So don't go spending the money until after the checks clear.
The damned lies of ASCAP, BMI and SESAC notwithstanding!

The Chain of Events SHOULD be somewhere on this order:

Get your Business House in order;
Record a commercially acceptable product;
Market Test the product, via promolibraries;
IF the product fails, go back to the drawing board;
IF the product works, go for the gusto;
Prepare a business plan for investors;
Operate your career like the BUSINESS it is!

This is the Kindergarten Course. Linked below is the Ph.D. 909, so don't audit the class, get neck deep in it! It does not cover booking, concert tours, artist management, etceteras, as that would fill another entire library. Suffice it to say, don't sign ANY contracts, management or otherwise until you need those services and expertise! By then you should have some idea of what constitutes an Idiot Element and what it takes to make money with your chosen profession. - The damned lies of ASCAP, BMI and SESAC notwithstanding!





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