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INTERNATIONAL INDUSTRIAL REVIEW!
ARTICLE 10
BEFORE YOU RECORD
WHAT WON'T WORK!
KISS OF DEATH ELEMENTS TO AVOID AT ALL COSTS!


Lyman Jergens,
International Industrial Review,
Staff Reporter,.
Los Angeles, CA.

More good record projects are destroyed in recording by fools than all the no-talents that ever lived!

First, only a complete idiot records anything before they have a hard contract for release and distribution. Emphasis DISTRIBUTION! Those who squander untold hours of tape, talent and equipment producing an emotional trip in hopes some record company 'will take it from there' are those proverbial fools from whom money is soon parted.

Record Companies do not need 'talent' or material: they need Executive Producers (ExP) with their share of the BUDGET!

Releases in the real world are owned by FOUR (4) entities, all of whom pay for promotion and THREE (3) who absorb distribution costs thereafter should there be any actual sales. The Super Four are: (1) Executive Producer (ExP), creator and Chief Financier of the project and who either owns the masters or represents the investors who do own it; (2) the Record Label, under whose license and liability the product is manufactured and sold; (3) the Music Publisher(s), who own the copyrights to the recorded material, various other rights and obligations that fall under Copyright Law; and (4) the General Licenser, who owns the distribution network and does the vast majority of administration.

The Label, Publisher(s) and General Licenser are the Big Three of Distribution once a disk is actually in demand. The ExP usually isn't required to invest any more money once a record is begins selling. But, that depends on the terms of the contract!

Therefore, before you record, get an Executive Producer's Record Release Agreement from one of the Super Six General Licensers. Not only will it insure that your record will be released, it will get up to seventy five percent of promotion on someone else's nickel! If they have the budget to take your project at all, the General Licenser will put up their share and get you a label and a publisher who will put up their respective shares. Now there's enough money in the bank to properly release, promote and distribute the record.

It will not get you any front money to record! Forget it and be ready to pay the recording costs and a quarter to a third of the promotion budget. And be ready to do business! You'll have no more than thirty days to deliver the Finished Production Masters and a check. Should something go wrong, for any reason, contact your Exec immediately! Let them hang for even twenty four hours and your deal can very well be in the nearest sewer. They have to make money on their money, and while you're dillydallying they'll go with something that's ready.

The General Licenser will give you all the specs, from running times to mix secrets of commercial acceptability. Follow those instructions to the letter or your deal is dead, contract or no contract. The General Licenser will provide you with an ESTIMATED BREAKDOWN, and that's the available deal, take it or leave it. It may be a matter of available money, or that your music really isn't setting the sales world afire regardless of what the media hype claims.

WHAT WON'T WORK!


1. Any indication that you're either Industry Ignorant or paranoid. Industry Ignoramuses queer deals at the outset, but paranoids queer deals after the money is invested! You'll queer one deal and never come off the Turkey List ever again.

2. Manufacturing product (even demo copies) to 'impress' the record company. You've just destroyed any and all anti-counterfeiting capabilities! There's a first generation copy of your master out who-knows-where. Commercial copies are made from copies of your master, so 'having your master back' only displays your Industry Ignorance.

3. Trying to do the record company's job for them! They have, and pay good money to, all the expertise necessary to do whatever is required from start to finish in each and every field of music. The very last thing anyone needs in this (or any other) business is interference! They know what to do and when to do it, and with their money on the line too, they won't make any mistakes.

4. Waiting for them to call YOU! Should any record company ever need 'talent' or material all they have to do is answer the phone or open the mail! Anyone who thinks 'it takes talent' to make a record should turn on the radio.

5. Not talking to their answering machines. People who want to do business know answering machines and voice mail systems are critical! Those who 'won't talk to them' have locked themselves out of the Industry with their own stupidity. Good riddance.

6. Going to a 'music capitol' to record. A tape deck or instrument will operate just as well at one address as any other, and General Licensers are unimpressed with people who squander money needlessly. Follow the General Licenser's production advice and your record will be as commercially acceptable as anybody else's.

7. Constant contacts with your Executive. Time squandered with you is time not spent taking care of the product! When there's news of any importance they'll contact you!

8. Don't take your half-cocked, used-car-salesmen reject 'managers' and other such baggage with you via contract or otherwise. Make sure if someone else represents you that they are: A) Industry Knowledgeable, B) have a spotless Industry Reputation, C) are not paranoids, and D) know how to do their job without spilling over into anybody else's.

9. Don't be caught dead presenting 'business plans' in the same vein as those palmed off by the Majors on wanna-be fools to insure they squander their budget and thus are kept out of the Industry and Competition on their own nickel. The most prime example is an "EP". Record Buyers don't want half an album and they cost as much to manufacture as a full production.

10. If you want an attorney to review your contract, get legal advice, not business advice. Lawyers suffer under the same what-won't-work nonsense as every other fool who has never made nor sold a record. And "not spending any of your own money" is the Title Page of each and every such scenario.

The General Licenser will present a copy of the broadcasters they've sent PromoRecords to after the record has run its course. The 'after' factor is to prevent destruction of the project by 'friends' and breach of contract, specifically the non-interference clauses.

One thing you'll need from day one besides money is original material! You can't just record somebody else's music anymore than you can just drive off with somebody else's car. You can perform it all you want to, but recording it takes a Mechanical License from the Publisher(s) prior to production and release of the record. Make sure your music is free and clear, and not plagiarized, unless you want a Lifetime Membership on the Industry's Turkey List.
(CLARIFICATION - Music Publishers, Labels and General Licensers do not throw their entire budget into a record project! They make their investments in proven product only, in accordance with market demand, and only as that market demand dictates. They do have an initial investment in any release - mostly administrative and legal fees - and each does their own process of promotion. However, the greater part of the financial burden with respect to whether a record will sell in commercially acceptable quantities or not is the sole and exclusive domain of the Executive Producer (ExP) and is paid for out of the ExP's share of the promotion budget. WARNING! Any successful record project must be handled from start-to-finish by, or in exact accordance with instructions from, the General Licenser! There are myriad of legal, administrative and marketing details that are critical to a successful record. Blasting off on your own incoherent emotional tangent of Beer Joint Baritone Ph.D. stupidity is the best way to pre-empt all of them, to sure and certain financial disaster! - General Bobby Farrell.)





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